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July 28, 2002 a crab unwinds While my former spouse enjoys a two week vacation in San Francisco, I've been living it up myself.  Just yesterday, I ate some Rice-A-Roni which is, after all, the San Francisco treat. And, today, I went for a bike ride and let my mind wander.  A nice policeman found it and returned it to me.  For some reason, I thought of famous crabs in cinema.  I'm not talking about Velma (Agnes Moorehead) in Hush... Hush, Sweet Charlotte or the demented janitor, Leroy (Henry Jones) in The Bad Seed.  I'm speaking of actual (though animated) crabs. Two came to mind:  Crusty in The Incredible Mr. Limpet and Sebastian in The Little Mermaid.  I've never warmed to story characters described as "crusty, yet lovable."  The same goes for real life.  If you're too crusty, then go fuck yourself.  Crusty in Mr. Limpet was ornery and spoke in a voice commonly associated with 49ers.  Sebastian was only prim and proper, characteristics I don't really mind.  And, besides, Sebastian could unwind.  He rocked the ocean floor with at least one calypso number.  Truth be told, I've always been a sucker for crustaceans who can use their claws as castanets.

©  2002 by the beastmaster